Pop Quiz - What do you get if you cross Matthew McConnaughey Movie Dazed and Confused with Gloria Gaynor Song I will survive? The Shopify Partner team of course. Let’s do the news.
Welcome to the V spot, your home for the ecomm nearly news. Lay offs are now a lay up using AI as the cause and earnings reports the reason. Amazon, Nike, Home Depot and Pinterest among those doing a “Frozen” and letting it go. Not sure Anna and Elsa wanted their song to be taken so literally.
Let’s do the news.
First Up: Target brings in 3,000 new beauty products across 30 new brands this week according to a press release. 90% of the products are under $20. Brand names that are sure to inspire at that price points - Supergoop and Morphe among the new names, faces.
Second story this week: Sydney Sweeney’s new lingerie line SYREN opened up this week. I was unable to browse the site due to some form of glitch in encountered upon loading the first video - it looped on repeat and has not stopped since. We tried sending a note to their agency but decided not to bother.
Third Up: CNN reported this week that the US consumer confidence is at its lowest it has been since 2014 declining 9 points. It is worth noting though that this survey included a pool of only 3 people, Jake Tapper, Anderson Cooper and Abby Philips.
Story of the week goes to Shoptalk Luxe: In a shocking departure from the 2026 conference circuit, attendees at this week’s Shoptalk Luxe have reported a rare sighting: human faces that aren’t distorted by the “Zoom-fatigue” filter or the existential dread of being replaced by a Large Language Model.
While every other conference this year has been a windowless basement crawl of “AI-enabled synergistic logistics,” Shoptalk Luxe has opted for a different kind of intelligence—Aesthetic Intelligence.
The most buzzed-about “innovation” wasn’t a chatbot; it was the physics-defying sight of hundreds of retail executives sipping crisp Rosé on a beach in a country where public alcohol consumption is generally a “polite no.”
“I’m not saying it’s a miracle,” whispered one CMO while shielding their glass from the desert sun, “but I’ve spent three days talking about ‘Heritage Branding’ and I haven’t heard the word ‘Prompt’ once. I think the wine is a hallucination, but it’s a high-fidelity one.
In a move that has baffled industry analysts, the “V Spot” can confirm there were zero sightings of the “Depressed Vendor.”
The Old Way: A lonely account executive in a 10x10 booth, eating a stale turkey wrap near a leaking cooling vent.
The Luxe Way: A “Strategic Partner” handing you a chilled towel while discussing the “sensory journey” of Gen Alpha.
The photos coming out of the Emirates Palace have been so well-lit and “not-dingy” that several tech CEOs back in Silicon Valley have reportedly filed complaints, claiming the event is “unfairly high-resolution” compared to the grainy reality of a Las Vegas convention center.
Sources say the AI isn’t gone; it’s just been demoted to its rightful place: doing the work while the humans drink on the beach. “We realized that if we let the AI write the strategy, we have more time to focus on the ‘Physicality of Luxury,’” said one attendee. “Which, in this case, is the physicality of this infinity pool. It’s a very robust use case.”
And finally, a palate cleanser before we head into the February madness. If you thought Shoptalk Luxe was a trip, wait until next Sunday. Super Bowl LX is officially upon us, and the price for 30 seconds of attention has hit a record $8 million.
At that price, you’d expect a cure for the common cold, but instead, we’re getting:
A-List Overload: Prepare for Lady Gaga crooning Mr. Rogers for a mortgage company and Sabrina Carpenter picking Pringles “petals.” It’s “Nostalgia Bait” at its finest essentially a $100 million effort to make you feel 10 years old again so you’ll buy a RAV4.
The “Weird-Core” Incursion: Keep an eye out for Manscaped’s talking shower-drain hair and Liquid Death’s army of papier-mâché heads. Apparently, the industry has decided that “terrifying the consumer” is the only way to beat the “skip ad” reflex.
AI Inception: While Shoptalk was a beachy escape from tech, the Big Game is doubling down. Expect “AI-generated” scenery and virtual signage that shifts in real-time. We’ve reached the point where the commercial might be more sentient than the person holding the remote.
The “V Spot” Survival Guide:
Avoid: Anything described as “Patriotic without being political.” It usually results in a 60-second montage of wheat fields that tells you absolutely nothing about the product.
Expect: A “Celebrity Curse” flip from Kendall Jenner and Andy Samberg becoming a mayonnaise-themed Neil Diamond.
Pro Tip: If an ad features a QR code, don’t scan it. That’s how the AI follows you home from the beach.
That’s it for the V Spot. We’re off to find a beach where the Rosé is real and the ads are non-existent.
